Is Your Relationship As Strong As You Think?
Billie Tyler • October 5, 2017
Relationships naturally go through ups and downs. But have you checked in with your partner lately? If not, that's okay. It's easy to get caught up in the busy rush of day-to-day life.
However, it's important to slow down and check in with your partner every once in awhile. There may be some areas of your relationship that could use a little TLC.
As a Couples Therapist in Spokane, I encourage all of my clients to check in with each other on a regular basis. It's no secret that communication is the key to a happy & health relationship.
If you need some ideas to spark conversation with your partner, then here are a few questions to get you started.
1. Do you feel like you’re growing together?
When we first start our relationships, we often set out on the same path. However, as time goes on, it's natural for things to change. Do you both still share the same goals? Do you feel like you are progressing together? Or are you starting to drift in different directions?
Drift is expected and okay. Even successful relationships go through drifts. However, make sure you continue to copilot the ever-evolving path together.
2. Do you feel like your opinions matter?
We all know that listening is love. However, it's common to feel unheard or misunderstood from time to time. Do you make an effort to listen to one another? Or do you tune each other out?
Even though disagreements are normal and natural, it's important to approach them with an open ear. In my counseling sessions, I help couples develop new communication patterns so each individual can have a voice, even when the topic is difficult.
3. Do you feel like you can be yourself?
In the beginning of a relationship, it can be tempting to act a different way around your partner. But over time, these feelings should fade as you become more comfortable. Do you act naturally around your partner? Or do you hide your true self?
It's a common misconception that you have to fuse your identity when you're in a relationship. But, in fact, the strongest relationships are built around each individual knowing their unique self and needs.
4. Do you feel like an equal?
Relationships are all about being on the same team. However, when an argument comes up, it's easy to have the mentality that you're on opposing teams. Do you work through your problems together? Or do you quickly become combative?
It's okay if you don't see things the same way. However, no matter the issue, it's important that you discuss issues as teammates.
As a Couples Therapist, I help couples get back on the same side because, almost every time, they want the same outcome. They just get stuck on proving each other wrong, so the goal gets lost.
5. Do you have fun together?
New relationships are fun and exciting. But, as time goes by, it's easy to start slipping into a rut. Do you still go out on dates? Do you still laugh together until your stomach hurts? Or are you a little wrapped up in other things?
Although the fun side of your relationship can get lost in the rush of day-to-day life, it's still important to enjoy your time together to maintain a happy and satisfying relationship.
6. Do you do nice things for each other?
Taking time to do nice things for each other is just as important as having fun together. When was the last time you did something special for your partner? And when was the last time they did something special for you?
If it's been too long, then think of something nice you can do to brighten up your partner’s day. Doing this regularly will help you continue to maintain a strong bond.
7. Do you feel safe and secure?
Trust is one of the most vital parts of a relationship. Do you feel like you can be vulnerable? Can you feel your partner’s support?
Often, this is truly the crux of many relationships issues. In my Spokane office, we focus on the moments when someone felt the most supported by the other person. And we build from there to create an even stronger bond and deeper connection.
I'm here to help!
Are you worried about your relationship? If so, I'm here to help.
As a Couples Therapist in Spokane, I help couples build happier and healthier relationships.
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About Billie Tyler
Hi, I'm Billie Tyler and I help couples in the Spokane area build happier and healthier relationships.
With a Masters Degree in Marriage and Family Therapy, my philosophy is to help couples find their strengths and build off of what's already working.
My goal is to help you and your partner start living the big, full life that everyone deserves.
Through openness and commitment, you and your partner can have the happier and healthier relationship that you long for.